One of the keys to having a happy marriage is keeping the lines of communication open. If John and I want to stay close and connected, it is really important that we share our thoughts and feelings. We believe that this is true, and yet it is sometimes difficult to find time each day to talk. When we are rushed and time is limited, it is tempting to be satisfied with sharing basic information. The urgency of making a family run smoothly can take priority over making the time for meaningful conversation.
John and I try to carve out precious time to talk whenever we can. We protect dinner time as often as possible, sometimes choosing a late dinner together over eating separately at a "normal" time. Weekend mornings spent talking over coffee are important to both of us. Anytime we find ourselves traveling in the car is an opportunity for a good conversation. Whenever moments such as these offer themselves, we try to take advantage of them. We try to get beyond the who, what, where and when questions of our family’s schedule and talk about the things that are important to us.
There are several questions that we like to ask each other as we try to springboard into meaningful conversation. What is the most significant thing that happened to you today? What is the biggest challenge to your faith right now? What made you happiest today? What is your favorite memory about (fill in the blank)? What are your fears? What are your hopes and dreams?
When we take the time to check in with each other often about our answers to questions such as these, it helps us to stay close and connected. It would be so easy to drift along as time slips away. Instead, we make every effort to continually know each other better and fall more deeply in love.